| hopeless romantic
My cellphone's beeping sound woke me
up one night. Used to receiving
important messages only, I grabbed my
cell and sleepily pushed the keys and
read the message.
"Hi there! Care 2 b my txtmate?"
Not knowing who the sender was, I deleted
the message right away and placed the
phone on my bedside table, I tried to
go back to sleep.
I had just closed my eyes when I heard
the message tone again.
"Hi there, again! Care 2 b my txtmate?"
again, the message said.
"Who the hell could this be asking for
txtmate at the wee hours of the
night?" I asked myself.
Again, without bothering to reply I deleted
the
message.
I was never a 'textmaniac' - someone
who enjoys texting anyone and everyone
even at the wee hours of night, not to
mention during the day. My parents,
who were always out of the country
forced me to own a cellphone. They told
me that having one was more
convenient - they could monitor me even
if they're miles away.
I wanted to turn the unit off, but since
my mother was fond of calling me at
night, just to check if I was safe at
home, I decided not to.
Just as I was to close my eyes and
return to my dreamless sleep, the phone
beeped again.
Same number...Such determination!
"Ply reply 2 dis msg & b an angel & save
me frm dis abyss of emptiness!!!"
I never knew why, but the message struck
me. I got up and pushed the keys... I
just realized I was replying to the message.
"Im not an angel, n f u want som1 2
save u, m not superman... I'm just a
simple prson who u wake up at dis r of
my nyt!!! Nway, do I know u?" I typed.
Seconds later came the reply.
"Nope. U don't know dis lonely soul. Nor
does she know u. But I want 2 b ur
frnd. I'm Mikaella Cervantes. U?"
"Just call me Julius. How'd u get my no.?" I
sent
back.
"Hi Julius, nice 2 meet u. Just shuffled
the last two digits of mine," she replied.
That was the first and maybe the last
time I met someone over the cellphone.
We exchanged messages and learned so
much about each other that night. We
only said goodbye when my alarm clock
rang at 5:00 AM! I had to prepare for
school!
And that was also how it all started. A
day would not pass without it loving
and thoughtful messages from her. It
was only then I had learned to
appreciate text messages and become
eager and excited everytime my phone
beeped, hoping it would be her.
Mikaella brought out something about
me that I never knew I had; I realized
I could also be a romantic person... even
if it's just through text messaging.
"Keep me as a frnd & I will keep u in my
heart. Lock it up & throw away d
key so dat no1 can evr tke u away from
me...">
One day, she sent this message
to me.
I replied: 'In life, we seldom find a true
prson &
f u evr find 1, hold on & nvr let go...
value dat prson coz it's lyf's
gift worth keeping & holdin on..."
I never knew why, but her response sent
shivers to my spine, " Value d pipol
hu hav touched ur life bcoz u will never
know just wen dey will walk out of
ur lyf & nvr come back again."
I couldn't understand what I felt that
moment, but one thing I was sure
though... I could not go on a day without
a single word from her. I'd become
used to having her, eventhough we had
not met personally. But truly, she
already occupied a space, a large one,
in fact in my life.
I texted her back. "Dont come close f l8r
ull jst pass by; don't touch me f
l8r ull jst let me cry; dont luv me f l8r ull
jst leave me and won't stay..."
I didn't know why I sent her that
message, but somehow I felt, every word
came from my heart. In the short span
of time we were sending messages to
each other, I knew, I was starting to
keep her in my heart.
I called her once. The voice on the other
end was like an angel's. Soft,
kind, full of love. Yet, there was
something in it I couldn't define. We
only talked for a few minutes. Before she
hung up, she told me not to call
again. According to her, it would be
better if we would just text each
other.
But the voice kept ringing, not only in my
head, but in my heart, I'd long
to hear it once more. I tried to call her
again, but she never answered the
phone. She just kept on sending
messages and quotations, which I copied
in a little notebook. Hopeless romantic? I
didn't know. All I could say was that
all the messages she sent me were
wonderful, they came from the heart and
cut through the heart.
"Though we r miles apart, u r always n
my heart. I close my eyes & der u r.
Even f I'll see u never, I'll always b hir 2
care 4 u, far longer dan
4ever..."
One December night, she sent
me this message. By that time we had
been exchanging messages for more
than a month. God knew how happy I was.
She was right. Although we had not
seen each other, what we felt was enough
to make us both realize what was
keeping us together.
I sent her another message, "Loving u
secretly is a hard thing 4 me 2 do,
hoping, wondring that u will feel d same
way 2, but I can't read ur mind f u
luv me 2. But whatever it is, I'll still be
loving u."
"How I wish I cud really tell u how much
u mean 2 me, but m afraid 2 love,
scared 2 get hurt... I hope dat u will wait
4 me & pray dat u will not get
tired of loving me...=)" was her reply.
And then I replied again. " The reason y
I met u is bcoz of destiny but f
destiny will suggest dat I'll live w/o u,
den, I'll lie not by destiny but of free
will."
Whenever I asked her when we would
meet personally, she always answered,
"Soon...soon, love...soon."
Not seeing each other did not lessen,
even a bit, what I felt for
her...rather, it even grew deeper and
stronger each day. And I was sure, she
felt the same way, too. Love messages
continued to flow through our lines,
between our hearts, which made us go
on each day with the thought that
sooner, we would see each other, face
to face, heart to heart.
Just a few days before Christmas. She
stopped sending messages. At first I
just though she had ran out of prepaid.
but there was something that kept
bothering me... I couldn't understand
what was it, but it made me fell
nervous. I tried to call her but she
wouldn't answer. Nevertheless, I
continued sending messages.>
Suddenly one night, just three days
before our Lord's birthday. I heard my
phone's message tone again... at last!
It was from her!
"Oftentyms we say gudbye 2 d 1 we luv
w/o wanting 2. Though dat doesn't mean
dat we stopped loving dem or we stopped
2 care. Sometyms, GOODBYE is a
painful way 2 say I LOVE YOU."
I was dumfounded. I didn't know what to
think of. What did she mean? I
texted her back, searching for answers,
but found nothing. I called her but
she would not answer.
For the first time in my life, I felt so
miserable...desperate... empty. I
didn't know what to do. I didn't want to
lose her. I had learned to love
her. And I wanted to be with her forever.
The following days I felt nothing but
emptiness. It seemed that Mikaella
took the life out of me. I missed her so
much...her messages...The tones
that would tell me she'd sent another
loving message. Nothing around me
could feel the emptiness I felt.
Tut...tut...tut...tut...tut...just a day
before Christmas, my cell beeped
again. It was her!
"Meet me at d café, 10 AM 2day," I read
aloud, making sure the message was
true, then I jumped with joy upon
hearing from her again. Hurriedly, I got
myself ready and I went to the mall. I
knew it was still early, but I wanted
to be there before she arrived.
I arrived at the meeting place ten
minutes earlier. I was surprised to see
her already there, smiling at me. She
was very beautiful, Black, deep-set
eyes that spoke a thousand words;
small, kissable lips; a nose perfectly
chiseled and long black hair - everything
in her was beautiful. And yes,
her eyes radiated kindness and love...but
there was a flicker of something
in them...sadness?
"Hi, Julius," said the angelic voice I had
been dreaming of each night. The
voice that I had waited to hear for so
long. "Please sit down."
"I am very pleased to meet you, Mikaella,"
I said, as I took my seat and
gave the roses I brought for her.
"Thanks, Julius," she smiled, obviously
pleased with the roses. I knew she
loved pink roses.
"You are always welcome, Love"
"Julius, I can't stay," she said, sadness in
her voice, or was it tears? "I really must
go."
"But we just met, Mikaella. Can't we talk
a little longer?" I asked, pleadingly.
"I can't really. I just came here to see
you and thank you for the time you
shared with me. Thank you for
everything, Julius. I will never forget
you...you will always be here in my
heart."
She was looking at me straight
into the eyes, and I could really feel the
sadness in her voice and I swear,
there was something in her voice and I
swear, there was something in those
lovely yet lonely eyes...
She got up and smiled at me, lovingly.
"Tomorrow morning, please come and
visit me," he said and gave me a piece
of white linen paper.
I read what was written and when I
looked up, she was gone.
The following day, Christmas, I woke up
early and excitedly readied myself,
thinking of her. I hurriedly went to
flower shop and bought a dozen pink
roses - for Mikaella.
They lived in an exclusive subdivision.
Upon reaching their house, I told
the guard who I was and that I was
looking for Mikaella.
The guard stared at me, sadness and
amazement in his eyes and told me to
wait as he called the owner of the
house. As I looked at him while he was
going inside the house, only then I
noticed that the house was brightly lit.
A woman went out and walked towards
me, smiling sadly.
"Hi, I'm Maria, Mikaella's mother. Please
come inside, Julius." While we>
were walking towards the mansion, she
explained to me why she knew me very
well - Mikaella had always been talking
about her friend, Julius. I hardly
understood what she was saying. I was
busy thinking why Mikaella's mother
was crying while talking to me.
As we came near the great hall of the house,
it dawned on me that there was a wake
inside, Maybe, a relative passed away,
I thought. But deep in my heart, I was
trembling and afraid.
As we entered the hall where so many
people were silently mourning while
others were praying, shaking, I asked
her mother. "Where is Mikaella?"
She held my hand and silently, led me to
the coffin which was surrounded by
flowers - pink roses, nothing but pinkroses.
No words could explain how I felt when I
gazed at the coffin and saw who was
lying there. The same beautiful girl I met...
A man came beside me, I knew he was Mika's
father.
"We are so glad you came, Julius. Mika
talked of you all the time. She even
asked that her phone be buried with her.
She said that in that way, you
could still send her messages and you
would always be with her."
I couldn't believe everything...
My mind was in limbo.
"But how can this be? We just saw each
other yesterday."
"That can't possibly be. She passed
away three days ago. She had been
suffering from a heart disease since she
was a child," said her father.
"But..." I couldn't find the words to say.
"She told us not to bother reaching you,
"her mother said, still in tears,"
she said you will come, and here you are.
Pain and bitterness overwhelmed me. I
cried silently beside her, staring at
her lovely face, memorizing every line of
my friend's face, a face I knew I
would never forget while I was still alive.
After the internment that afternoon, I
went to the chapel she had told me
she went everyday.
Sitting there praying and crying to God, I
held my phone and typed: "U
taught me how 2 care; u taught me how
2 b kind; u shwd me how 2 lyk som1; u
shwd me how 2 luv; but ders 1 thing u
didnt teach me & it hurts mor - u
didnt teach me how 2 let go. I LOVE YOU"
I sent the message, and though I knew
she wouldn't be able to hold her CP
again, I knew in my heart she would get
my message.
"I will never forget you, Mikaella and
will never let go..." I vowed to
her and to myself as I left the church.
May you have enough happiness to make you
sweet, enough trials to make
you strong, enough sorrow to keep you human
and enough hope to make you happy. |
